Nate’s 12 Amazing Christmas Gifts for 2009
Let’s face it, the joy of giving is one of the best parts of the Christmas season, but it’s not always easy finding just the perfect gift for everybody on your list. That’s why I’m happy to provide my second annual list of Amazing Christmas Gifts.
12. Poopin Santa – Sometimes the hardest people to shop for are people like mailmen and teachers–you know the people that you want to wish a Merry Christmas to, but want t
o spend more than $5. I’m happy to announce that I’ve found just the perfect gift and it combines three great things–Santa, chocolate, and taking a crap. This adorable Santa Claus poops yummy chocolate and is available for $4.99 at Perpetual Kid.com
11. Going Rogue – Sarah Palin’s first novel would have rated higher, but it’s a book. Amazon.com has these babies listed at $14.50, but I have a feeling if you can wait a few days, you’ll be able to find one under $12 and under $10 if you don’t mind an autographed copy.
10. Christmas Cross – This was on my Christmas list for 2008 and though it’s slipped a bit, you can’t beat this burning cross for showing the love of Christ burning within you. Things didn’t work out so well for me when I left it on my black neighbor’s lawn as a surprise on Christmas Eve night to let them know there were no hard feelings over the election, but I still think this is a great gift for only an $80 donation to the American Family Association.
9. Fetus Cookie maker – Whether you’re picketing an abortion clinic or celebrating a new pregnancy, there is no better way than with homemade fetus cookies. Get your cookie mold for only $10 at Hogmalion.
8. Toy Soldier Candle Holder – One of the most universal symbols for peace this holiday is to leave a candle in the window. What better way to show that your house believes in peace through strength than with a plastic toy soldier candle holder. Finally, I have a way to feel manly as I burn through my Yankee Candles. The holders are available for $36 at Kikkerland.com.
7. War
m Whiskers Neck Wraps – Nothing warms up a cold neck on a freezing January evening like a piece of fresh road kill. Unfortunately, as the animal begins to pass from this world, his warmth also dissipates and a few days of wear, the little fella is really going to start to stink. These adorable neck wraps from Warm Whiskers.com are rewarmable and free of rotting. At only$42, they’re a deal. I really like the Husky myself.
6. Gun Alarm Clock – Bandai makes these in Japan, but you can find them to import if you’re lucky. When the alarm goes off, the only way to stop it is to blast it with your gun. There is no better way to wake up refreshed in the morning than to start the day out with some shooting. You can order here and check out the video–it’s cool yes!
5. A Savior is Born: The Precious Moments Nativity Scne – Long time readers of this blog will recall that I am a big fan of Precious Moments figurines. Like all their products, their nativity scene is first rate, though it does bother me a little that they bowed to multiculturalism by making one of the Wisemen a brunette. Still, even at $250 this is sure to be a hit for any holiday season.
4. Journey Through the Creation Museum DVD – Perhaps, Kentucky’s greatest achievements to both science and religion is the Creation Museum located in Petersburg, KY. This thrilling DVD lets you take a trip back in time to when giant dinosaurs roamed the other before they turned their back on God and were struck down. It’s a bargain for under $20.
3. Seattle Sutton’s Healthy Evening – What better way to show a daughter struggling with a weight problem that you care then by signing her up for a weight loss program. Seattle Sutton makes eating healthy convenient.
2. Mass We Pray – The greatest game for the Wii ever, from a spiritual sense anyway. This product gives children all the excitement of mass and Catholic sacraments all from the comfort of their own home. You know how boring church can be, what better way to liven it up for your kids? I only hope that they’ll have a Protestant version by next Christmas. It won’t be available until Easter, but you can preorder it now.
1. Play-Doh Cologne – Made for the 50th anniversary of play-doh, the cologne will make you smell just like the delightful children’s toy. For only $10, you will truly impress at any board meeting or night out on the town with that special someone.
Urgent Plea from Congressman Kimble
[From Congressman Kimble's webpage]
As you know, the Senate is voting on Health Care this coming Saturday. It is very urgent that we stand up to the Obama/Pelosi agenda to take over health care in this country, but we can’t do this without your help. The vote will be televised live in prime time and as we saw during our vote in the House, the sight of a member of congress holding a small child to argue against health care is a very powerful image. Unfortunately, we have a shortage of small children. What we are looking for is cute children, preferably between ages 2-4 who are potty trained and not criers. Please, no ugly children–they just won’t be as effective on camera. We will return your baby safe and sound after the vote. If you have a baby please either phone 202 863-8500 or email Leadership@rnc.org. Please put Cute Baby Available in the Subject line.
A Book Review of Going Rogue
A literary triumph ****
I hate reading. Books are an outdated art form that should have died off in the 1950s with the advent of television, but somehow they keep making them and saps keep buying them. Going Rogue is an exception to this rule. Her book, along with the Bible, are the only 2 books that one need ever own. Sarah’s story is at once powerful and touching, revealing a strong mind and a dynamite sense of humor beneath her homespun charm. I give this book a very solid 4 stars and urge everybody to not only buy this book, but keep an eye out for Sarah’s tour so that you can get it signed as well. The crowds turning out so far have been truly impressive as well–very much like a Harry Potter release, but without all that black magic and devil worship.
I have not actually read this book, and attempts to coax my daughter to ghost read it for me fizzled when she balked at a $50 bribe. However, as I look at reviews from other sources, I’m sure that this is an outstanding work. Finally! we get to hear her own words, fully – unedited without the slanderous spin as only Lynn Vincent could tell it. Vincent is an amazingly gifted writer, but the words and meaning are pure Palin. It’s very difficult for me to talk about actual incidents in the book without actually reading it, but I am sure they are powerful and moving. I have read in other reviews that she agrees in the book with my contention that FDR’s liberal policies caused the Great Depression.
Liberals hate Sarah Palin because they know that she represents every woman and they know that they have nothing to counter her with. Her long and distinguished career in public office from Wasilla Mayor to almost finishing a term as Governor of Alaska to almost becoming Vice-President is clearly showing that the glass ceilings feminists have been claiming for so long don’t really exist. It seems a White House run is the next logical step for her career and as an American I for one can’t wait.
The War on Thanksgiving 2009
My daughter’s online school newsletter contained the following graphic. I was naturally outraged and called her bleeding heart principal for all the good it did. In fact, the offending image is still up there. I hate how liberal her school is. The thing is, I’m not even as outraged about the backwards American flag waving in cruel socialist mockery as I am about the happy turkey day.
I have written before about the atheist agenda to eliminate Thanksgiving, that pious religious holiday where we all give thanks to the Lord for the gifts that he has bestowed upon us. In its place, they wish to leave turkey day–a celebration of eating turkey. Have these unbelievers no shame in turning one of the most sacred of all holy days for an annual poultry equivalent of Prince Spaghetti Day?
Just as bad is Black Friday. Where do consumers get off expecting such ridiculous discounts from hard working retailers. I like the fact they’re open 24 hours, but if you’re going to buy a $600 flat screen for $250 you shouldn’t have to pay your employees full price. They should just be grateful to pick up the extra hours at 4 AM.
As a country, we must do battle with those who have declared war on Thanksgiving. If a story is having a “Black Friday” or “Turkey Day” sale, do not patronize them. When somebody wishes you a Happy Turkey Day, in a forceful yet friendly way let them know that you do not celebrate turkey, but instead give thanks for the many blessings you have received. Only if they show that they don’t get it, should you get more aggressive with them. As a non-violent protest, I have taken to spraying Thanksgiving on holiday decorations that have been secularized. I believe that that is what the people who celebrated the first Thanksgiving would have wanted, the ones who didn’t die of small pox anyway.
Congressman Kimble Gets Tough On Salazar
Wow! He’s not messing around. That’s for sure. I guess this primary is becoming a bit tougher.
US Courts are No Place for the Truly Evil
I love legal shows like LA Law or Night Court as much as the next guy, but to be an informed citizen of the United States means to understand the limitations of our legal system. Right now, the Supreme Court is hearing a case about whether juvenile offenders can be given life without parole in cases that don’t involve homicide. That seems to be the thing that our court system is good for. Insurance fraud, spammers, even a simple assault is what our court system handles best. If you make it handle a case involving something like terrorism, you have to remember that there are two possible verdicts and one of them you’re not going to like.
Today, in a completely boneheaded move, the Obama administration announced plans to try the 9/11 conspirators in New York. I wish they would reconsider, our courts are not set up to handle the truly diabolical like Osama Bin Laden , Khalid Sheik Mohammed, or my ex-wife Kimberly. I know I shouldn’t blog after I’ve been drinking or while I am drinking for that matter, but somethings need to be said, like why this is a very stupid idea. No wonder many conservative bloggers have called Obama’s decision to attempt to give the terrorists a fair trial and not hold them indefinitely without trial–a further step towards totalitarianism.
The problem is anything said by the terrorists under duress can’t be used in court. In fact, if for example, one of the interrogators was yelling at Khalid Sheik Mohammed after catching him to plot to do something really evil and the neighbors called enough times, the police could threaten to make the interrogator spend the night in prison even if Khalid was the one who was sleeping with the personal trainer across the street or trying to blow up something. The US Courts are unable to discern what happens when one person spends long nights at the office and the terrorists claim that they’re not getting any support at home and that they’re bored and lonely. Frankly, if you plot an attack that kills Americans on American soil it shouldn’t matter if you’re lonely anyway.
I have no doubt that this big show trial will have the world riveted, but in the end I won’t be surprised if the United States loses and we have to let the terrorists go. Let me tell you it won’t be fun when we see them living in our house with a personal trainer and we’re left wondering just what we as a country did that was so bad. What? Just answer me that. What did the United States ever do that was so bad?
Poor People Must Work Harder
As I was driving through a questionable neighborhood on the South Side of Chicago last night, it occurred to me that my expensive truck was out of place amid the urban squalor. As I saw old people scurrying down the street in tattered Fall jackets, it occurred to me that I probably spend more on gas in a week then some of these people earn. It’s very sad to drive down city streets and see the very people who should be building up our economy thrown away on the city streets with no job and no prospects. Has the system failed them? I think not. They have failed the system and for that, they owe those of us who are capitalists a big apology.
If this country is to make it out of the economic morass that the Obama administration has put us in, we need everybody. When America struggled through the Great Depression, there was a veritable army of plucky youngsters selling apples and newspapers. When was the last time that you had somebody come up to you and try to sell you an apple? Has America really lost that kind of spirit and desire to better it’s lot in life? My dad had it. He started out from humble upper middle class beginnings and built a multi-million dollar business that he could be proud to leave to me. I have dreams of my daughter someday marrying a man who I could leave my business to and I continue to steward it for just such an eventuality.
The poor are lazy and ruining our economy just when we need them most. Maybe, it’s the result of well meaning liberals who have coddled the poor. Maybe they just weren’t fortunate enough to have a John Peele to teach them the value of a buck. One thing’s for sure, until they stop lounging around and start taking the initiative, we are doomed to a jobless recovery. If I was poor right now, I’d probably collect wood and build furniture that I could sell. I’m sure if people put their mind to it, they could come up with some great ideas too. Rich and poor we’re all in this together–that’s what America is all about.
The Lessons of Veterans Day
Veteran of the Culture Wars - Lou Dobbs
Today, millions of Americans were off from work because of Veterans Day, but I wonder how many really thought about why they were off. Veterans Day is a day to think about those brave few who gave so much for this country. I do this in the way I have since I was a small child, by watching war movies. Nothing says “thank you” to our country’s veterans like watching their exploits dramatized on cable television. One of my regrets in life is that I was unable to serve in the military. Unfortunately for me, my family was well off and I really had no option other than college, but I like to think I would have been a great soldier. The American fighting man is the best in the world and we do them a grave disservice when we don’t use them. To our veterans who served when their country needed them, I thank you.
It seems fitting that Lou Dobbs would leave CNN today. Like me, Dobbs isn’t a veteran of trench warfare, but he is a veteran of the culture wars. Nobody has done more to heighten the fear of middle America to the dangers of illegal aliens. I hope he winds up on Fox News or runs for public office, but I want everybody to remember the sacrifice that he has made for all of us, especially if he has to take a job at Univision or something. Lou and I aren’t soldiers, but we have been wounded in this cultural war and we continue to try and fight the good fight. Isn’t that what Veterans Day is all about?
Liberal Media Bias Invades Boobah
We Republicans have been watching a lot of television lately. In February of 1999, Jerry Falwell went after Teletubbies for the obvious homosexual subtext of the show. Recently, Bill O’Reilly and Andrew Breibart showed outrage at Sesame Street when the show aired a rerun and on second viewing they realized that when Oscar the Grouch called Pox News trashy, he was really taking a jab at Fox News. I’m actually kind of surprised it took repeated viewing for such an obnoxious attack to sink in.
I have always given PBS a wide berth because I believed that their political messages were going over the heads of small viewers so if Thomas the Tank Engine was pushing for organized labor or Dora the Explorer was calling for amnesty for illegal immigrants I didn’t say anything. I even ignored Clifford the Big Red Dog’s subtle messages about the danger of feeding animals growth hormones. However, the PBS show Boobah has finally gone to far.
Boobah is nothing more than political indoctrination. I’m not talking about their insipidly saccharine messages of fat acceptance and racial harmony, but of their constant shilling for the Obama administration. To begin with, you need to translate baby talk. Don’t forget just how young and audience that this show is aimed at. When Emily was a little girl I could never get her to say the words “special prosecutor” usually it would come out as something like “procu”. A small child saying “Obama” would end up saying something like “Boobah”. The repeated saying of the word Boobah over and over in the show indoctrinates small children that Obama is their friend.
Now it is possible that this is a coincidence and I’m overreacting a bit. However, if you look at the ball floating in at the beginning of the show’s intro. That floating ball of light looks very familiar. Now where have I seen it before? Hmm? I think I remember now. Was it here?
Now, we’re starting to get past the realm of any possible coincidence. Our tax dollars are going to support PBS and while I do enjoy the occasional Yani concert from the Acropolis, I do not approve of my tax dollars being used to support indoctrinating our preschool children to blindly serve President Obama. If we don’t put a stop to this now, there is no telling where it will spread to next.
Imagine Schools Cash in On Education
Dennis Bakke is on top of the education world. As the CEO of Imagine Schools, he oversees the fastest growing brand name in the education business with over 36,000 students at 74 schools in 12 states and the District of Columbia. He is rightfully heralded as one of the leaders of the education reform movement. The Washington Post lauded Mr. Bakke and his wife Eileen for winning a lawsuit to force Maryland to increase their funding for charter schools by over 60%. Jason Botel, who directs KIPP charter schools in Baltimore, is one educator who knows what the Bakkes have accomplished. “Their funding of advocacy efforts has helped make sure that . . . charter schools like ours can provide a great education for children in Maryland,” he said.
Bakke has done quite well for himself and for other charter operators. In fact, last year he donated $20,000 to Republican politicians in his own name. He’s a member of The Family, a Christian organization that was recently in the news following several sex scandals. What does Bakke owe his success too? He sums up his philosophy in two words, “have fun”, which is a philosophy that has served Bakke well over the years. In fact, he wrote a book on it called “Joy at Work” which was a very successful publication. The Bakkes say parents are attracted to their schools in part because of the emphasis on character. “We talk to the kids from Day One,” Eileen Bakke said. “What does it mean to be responsible? What does it mean to have integrity?”
One trick that Imagine Education has used was just revealed in the Saint Louis Post Dispatch in the form of a leaked email from Bakke to his top executives at Imagine Schools. The email explains several tricks for picking the executive boards of Imagine Charter Schools carefully to avoid board members who feel, “ownership of the school. Many honestly believe it is their school and that the school will not go well without them steering the school toward “excellence”. They believe they are the “governing” Board even if that adjective to describe the board has never been used by an Imagine School person.”
The board members probably get this idea from local laws that usually require local residents govern the charter school. There is an excellent article in the November 1st Fort Wayne Journal Gazette that shows how the entire charter process was manipulated by Bakke and Imagination Schools in opening up 4 chart schools in Fort Wayne Indiana. The paper concluded that the advisory board makes no decisions and gives no advice, “Not the $87,510 a year to operate school buses. Not $114,871 to run a lunch program. Not which teachers are hired or whether to hold summer school, or even whether to borrow more than $1 million for operations.”
So how much money is Imagination Schools making on the for profit education game? In Indiana the local contract required the schools there to give the parent company 12 cents on every tax dollar they took in. This seems to be a fairly standard contract for the company. If they have 36,000 students and states are giving them on average about $6,000 per student simple math comes out to about $26 million tax free. That’s good, but let’s face it you can barely pay the salary of one power hitting third baseman for that. Fortunately, you can’t beat real estate for generating profits.
The Dallas News explained how Imagine’s real estate works. The real estate arm of Imagine Schools is called Schoolhouse Finance:
In Nevada, the state awarded 100 Academy of Excellence in North Las Vegas a charter, and the school hired Imagine to run its educational services. Schoolhouse Finance, the Imagine subsidiary, paid for the school’s property and building construction. Schoolhouse Finance then leased the property to the charter school for $1.4 million a year.
Next, Schoolhouse Finance sold the $8 million property to a real estate investment trust, Kansas City, Mo.,-based Entertainment Properties Trust. The trust then leased the property back to Schoolhouse Finance at a lower rate than the charter school pays.
Money remaining after Schoolhouse Finance pays its lease to the trust goes to Imagine Schools Inc. This tiered lease system has led to 10 percent returns on investment for owners and investors in the two companies.
A principal in Indiana and another one in Las Vegas were fired after complaining to Imagine about rent that cost them approximately 40% of their operating budget. Most charters pay 10-15% of their operating budget for rent if they don’t own the property outright. This leaves the schools with very little money for things like books and teachers. From May of 2008 until November of this year, Imagine went from 51 to 74 schools. Yet, this year the teachers at the Imagine Charter School in Weston, FA were hit with pay cuts of up to 22 percent.
OK, I had to do another serious education story and yeah, it’s kind of dry with all the money talk. Sometimes, outrage does overtake my desire for satire. The point here is that in the world of for profit education, expanding is everything. Whether you’re talking about KIPP, UNO, or any of the other charter school groups with multiple schools you have to follow the money. Tax dollars that should be going to the children of this country, in too many cases are going to companies like this. Is this really reform? Is opening up more schools like this really a race to the top?
