That’s Right Nate

I was extremely shocked and angry this evening when I caught Roger Ebert’s review of the movie The Green Zone.  The movie is a fictionalized story about the invasion of Iraq and particularly the days after the war and the search for weapons of mass destruction.    This movie is perhaps the biggest load of sewage ever to be foisted on the American public.   Matt Damon’s character is actually targeted for assassination by his U.S. military colleagues and corrupt government officials after not finding weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.  Obviously, stuff like that would never happen.   When Joe Wilson reported the lack of WMDs in the real world, Karl Rove and Dick Cheney simply outed his wife as a CIA operative.  No effort was made to assassinate these people.

The worst part of the movie is when Matt Damon’s character goes on his one man anti-government campaign we’re supposed to root for him like we would if he was an angry protester flying his own small plane into an IRS building.   What Damon does is treason and I will tell Hollywood right now that I will never root for treason.  There was an unconfirmed report from Buffalo, New York by the Buffalo News and by Fox News that two older couples walked out during a screening.   I still remember when I was in high school watching many older couple walk out on the Kenny Rogers movie Six Pack in the same kind of political protest.  The movie tanked shortly after.

The movie was made by Universal Studios which is a division of GE who are the same liberals who bring us MSNBC to criticize American values and blindly support the President on a nightly basis.  At first, I was very intrigued to see the movie because it looked like mindless escapist entertainment like The Hurt Locker, but instead I see it’s full of heavy handed politics, which I don’t need from my movies.  I urge all my readers to boycott this movie and instead urge Hollywood to begin making more of the movies we want to see about heroic American soldiers who put it all on the line whether they’re fighting for this great country or relaxing with a game of beach volleyball.

Despite amazing special effects like these, Avatar is the worst movie ever made.

I know several people have asked me for my take on Avatar and I try not to disappoint my faithful readers.   Avatar is the worst movie ever made.   It has groundbreaking 3-D special effects, but after awhile,  they can’t cover up the thin plot that is your typical recycled story that they borrowed from Dances with Wolves, The Last Samurai, and Brian’s Song.    Action takes place on the planet Pandora, where a bunch of 10 foot tall blue aliens live.   This is where the lead character winds up.   At first, he goes there to infiltrate the aliens, but eventually he goes native.

Obviously, this movie is an analogy for our foreign policy.  I find this movie insulting and anti-American and I have no doubt that if I went to see it, I would find it to be the worst movie I ever saw.  I thought of leading a boycott of this movie,  but I realized there are already several great conservative boycotts of the movie so I had no need to reinvent the wheel.   The problem is that a group of left wing nut jobs is already boycotting Avatar, supposedly because it doesn’t advocate transgenderism.   I find this to be a horrible situation.   How do I let James Cameron know that I do not approve of movies like Avatar that show America in such a negative light while not supporting showing transgenders in a positive light?  Please readers and help me with this dilemma because I’m stuck.

UPDATE: I have been told that this picture was not actually from the movie Avatar, but from an older movie called Flash Gordon.   Now, this one looks good. I’m sure the anti-heterosexual boycotters would cringe at this decidedly masculine image, but I think I’m going to pick this one up on Netflix.

Friends and long time readers of this blog will remember my problems with customer service from the Salvation Army last year when they refused to issue me a refund  after I reached into my pocket to throw a quarter into a Salvation Army kettle and inadvertently gave the Salvation Army a  South African Krugerrand worth about $900.   After getting the run around, I finally took my case to you my loyal readers and my boycott of the Salvation Army was extremely successful in lowering their donations last Christmas season.  I believed the Salvation Army was very close to giving in.

Unfortunately, about the worst thing that can happen to any boycott is when your arch enemies decide to boycott the same thing you are boycotting.   That happened this year when liberals also began to boycott the Salvation Army when they learned that the Salvation Army was checking citizenship status at toy drives this holiday season.  I was naturally incensed.   There was no way for the Salvation Army to know whether their donations were down because of this policy or because of their refusal to refund the $899.75 I demanded.

Good news.  The  Salvation Army has relented and has announced it won’t be checking citizenship.   That means that we are clear to resume boycotting the Salvation Army in good conscious.   Let’s face it, can you really even call them an army if they won’t arm themselves?   They could be taken out by a pack of Cub Scouts with a sling shot.  Even the Vatican’s guards get halberds.

So Salvation Army, now that you have caved to liberal demands it is on like Donkey Kong.   The forces of this blog have been unleashed to destroy your unfair organization and only you can call them off by giving me what is rightfully mine.   Until that day, the boycott continues.  Please respond to this post and let the Salvation Army know that you mean  business.

They have come so close to feeling the wrath of my boycott in the past, but The New York Times has finally crossed the line and now they will suffer the consequences.  I am calling on all my readers to stop reading the New York Times following their hatchet job on the entire self-storage industry in their New York Times Magazine article entitled The Self-Storage Self.

I do not need to tell my readers just how important the self-storage industry is to this country.   American prosperity depends on accumulating stuff and you can’t accumulate stuff if you have no place to put it.   In fact, it would not be an exercise in hyperbole to call self-storage the lifeblood of our economy.  The New York Times in their horrendous attack piece were not only irresponsible, but unpatriotic, and a threat to those very things this country holds dear.   I ask all of you as Americans to add The New York Times to our boycott list.

So far we have had very successful boycotts against Skating Babies and  The Department of Homeland Security.  We drove Dark Knight from the theaters, cut Salvation Army donations, made Alan Colmes leave Fox, and are in the middle of bringing the Iowa mustard industry to its knees.  We’ve proved that boycotts work and we will continue to stand up for our rights.  New York Times, you’ve been warned.

As you can see, it wasn't until later that the Klu Klux Klan became a terrorist organization. Here they are saving Mary Pickford's honor.

Last week, the Department of Homeland Security warned that that “the recession and the election of President Obama are “fueling resurgence” of right-wing extremist groups that are seeking new recruits, especially returning veterans.”  Really?   Does anybody remember when the DHS did important stuff like letting us know what the terrorism color for the day was?  This is an outrage and one that I will not put up with from my government.  Pat Robertson got it right when he said that somebody in the DHS is either  a “convinced left winger or somebody whose sexual orientation is somewhat in question.”

Now, I will be the first to admit that after the Civil War, returning confederate Veterans were the ones who started the Klu Klux Klan and I certainly won’t deny that the KKK is a terrorist organization, but if you saw Birth of a Nation, you know it wasn’t always that way.  Sure, it was veterans like retired Marine Corps Major General Smedley Butler who were behind the attempted 1934 Coup against FDR.   I’ll even grant that Timothy McVeigh may have been a little on the conservative side when he blew up the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma.  However, McVeigh only had lose ties to some militias and wasn’t really a member of an organized group.  This is hardly a pattern of right wing violence and certainly not terrorism.

Maybe, the DHS was worried because of the Pittsbugh shootings, but nothing could be further from the truth.  Richard Andrew Poplawski was a young man convinced the nation was secretly controlled by a cabal that would eradicate freedom of speech, take away his guns and use the military to enslave the citizenry.  He despised the military.  He obviously wasn’t a veteran.  No, what the DHS case is based on is half-truths and outright lies.

I don’t have to tell you dear readers about the power of our boycotts.   We drove Dark Knight from the theaters, cut Salvation Army donations, made Alan Colmes leave Fox, and are in the middle of bringing the Iowa mustard industry to its knees.  Only Bill O’Reilly’s recent ass kicking of Spain can trump us, but I’m not yet that good.  Bill O’Reilly is an aspiration for me though.  Believe me.  Now I’m asking you to boycott the Department of Homeland Security.   It really isn’t that tough.   If you see a suspicious looking package just ignore it.  If you are in a foreign country and somebody asks you to take a package with you for one of their friends then go ahead and do it.  Don’t report suspicious people either.  We can make the DHS reallize that there is nobody that loves this country more than conservatives or veterans except for maybe conservative veterans.

I know for a lot of you, I’m not only your first source of news and information, but I’m also something of a hero.  But, I bet you don’t know who my hero is.  It isn’t Ronald Reagan or Thomas Jefferson or even Bill O’Reilly–its you guys.  Why is that?  Because once again you have proven the power of this little tool of Democracy that I like to call www.thatsrightnate.com.

Last week, I wrote to explain about my troubles with the Salvation Army.  It seems that when I reached into my pocket for a quarter, I accidentally tossed in a Krugerrand worth over $900. When I called the Salvation Army I got no satisfaction. Not a big surprise there, but what that poor excuse for a military organization wasn’t counting on was the power of this blog to mold minds.

I was checking out the news today and it is full of stories about the effect of our little boycott. Reports are flooding in from Montana, Pennsylvania, Colorado, Michigan, and Ohio

Now I’m not stupid. I know I only have 150,000 readers to this blog and that’s not enough people to make a difference…by themselves, but with your strong word of mouth campaign you have made history. All it would have taken for the Salvation Army to avoid your wrath is to return my rightful property. Now try feeding the hungry or giving shelter to the homeless with that $900 or better yet maybe your army can invade a country that you didn’t piss off by stealing from me. The Salvation Army joins the films Dark Knight and Stop Loss as well as Alan Colmes and Magic Johnson in feeling your righteous wrath.

Wow!  Those of you that read this blog are truely heroes.   For the past dozen years Alan Colmes has been spewing his brand of leftwing insanity and hate speech on the otherwise fair and balanced Fox News.  Then, he ran afoul of this blog and just like Stop Loss and  The Dark Knight before him Alan Colmes is gone.

It took nearly 3 months of pressure, but Fox ratings have been slowly slipping and that is one thing that broadcasters even ones with the integrity of Rupert Murdoch can’t abide.

“I approached Bill Shine (FNC’s Senior Vice President of Programming) earlier this year about wanting to move on after 12 years to develop new and challenging ways to contribute to the growth of the network,” Colmes said in a statement. “Although it’s bittersweet to leave one of the longest marriages on cable news, I’m proud that both Sean (Hannity) and I remained unharmed after sitting side by side, night after night for so many years.”

Wow, finding new ways to contribute to the growth of the network–that translates to not letting the door hit him on the way out.  Fox wouldn’t come flat out and say it, but those aren’t exactly career goals.    Congradulations my loyal viewers.  We are now 3 for 3 on boycotting films and television.  We may have lost the election, but we are winning the culture war.

If you remember, last week I challenged you. I set a bar of $30,000,000 and asked for a “concerted effort” to drop Batman’s take below $30,000,000 this week.  Honestly, I didn’t think it could be done.  Well, my heroes I am happy to tell you that we didn’t just drop it to $30,000,000.   This week Batman’s take was a paltry $26,000,000.  Now, remember this movie took in over $160,000,000 before the boycott.

By my calculations, we have cost Warner Brothers over $200,000,000 with our boycott.  This is not chump change for one blog fed up with lie-beral propaganda in the media.  However, I know that the internets and word of mouth are a powerful tool.  I hope this serves as a warning to all of Hollywood.  Start making Conservative movies if you want us to see them.

On July 24th, I called on the readers of the blog to boycott the Dark Knight movie as the piece of liberal propaganda that it was.  Your response has been both overwhelming and humbling for me.  Together we are taking on Hollywood and winning.  What’s more, the big beneficiary of our boycott seems to be The Mummy 3 which is a patriotic movie showing how the American family can stand up to Chinese imperialism and defeat their plan for global superiority.  In the weekend before I announced the boycott, The Dark Knight racked in nearly $160,000,000.  I was worried that I was too late in getting out my boycott appeal on July 24th, but the weekend following the boycott announcement the movie’s gross dropped to only $75,000,0000.  With the boycott in full swing this week the movie has dropped to less than $44,000,000.  I believe with a concerted effort we can drop it to around $30,000,000 this week.  Of course, you don’t hear about this on the mainstream media anywhere.  I guess grassroots movements aren’t flashy enough.  Flashy or not its working and that is all because of you my readers.

Dear Mr. Johnson,

First, allow me to state that I am a big fan of you as a basketball player.  I thought you were a classy individual and somebody I wouldn’t have minded having move in next to mean when you were a player.  In fact when you contacted aids I was sure that it was not the result of homosexual behavior and I told that to all my friends.

Your class did not end when your playing career ended.  You became an entrepeneur and your Magic Johnson Theatres have been raking in the cash while bringing high quality movie entertainment to Urban environments.

I am calling on you to be a role model for the black youth who attend your theatres.  Your mom was, I am sure, a God fearing woman.  When she named you Earvin that was the name I am sure she expected you to use.  I must object to the name Magic in the strongest possible way.  I believe that the positive spin your nickname puts on witchcraft could indeed lead the more innocent astray.

I represent a blog with nearly 50,000 readers.  I assume that some of them live in urban environments and frequent your theatres.  I have announced a boycott of the Magic Johnson Treatres until their name is changed to the Earvin Johnson Theatres.  This is no idle threat.  We are directly responsible for Hostess removing the wizard from packages of Fruit Pies.

In closing, I am a big fan and I am sure that you will do the right thing.  If you would like to discuss this matter further please call me at XXX-XXX-XXX.

Sincerely,

Nate Peele

Malachi 3:5 – And I will come near to you to judgment; and I will be a swift witness against the sorcerers, and against the adulterers, and against false swearers, and against those that oppress the hireling in his wages, the widow, and the fatherless, and that turn aside the stranger from his right, and fear not me, saith the LORD of hosts.