That’s Right Nate

My friends, I don’t mind telling you that we find ourselves in a culture war.  The forces of radical atheism again threaten to rob this great country of the symbols of it’s freedom and it’s proud Christian heritage.   If these people have their way all traces of Halloween’s Christian roots would be erased and all references to Jesus would be stricken from Halloween parades, store displays, and the hopeful mouths of trick or treating Christian children.    We must all stand together against this atheistic tyranny.

One of the stories, atheists don’t want you to know is the story of the Jack O’Lantern.   In Ireland, Christians were persecuted for many centuries.  One of the reasons that St. Patrick was celebrated for driving the snakes from Ireland is because they used to feed Christian children to the snakes.   Christians were kept poor and not allowed to hold jobs.  Their possessions were simple, but their faith was mighty.

As the Irish traveled along the countryside at autumn harvest time looking for work picking crops, they were frequently met with signs that said Christians need not apply.   Even a non-Christian who hired a Christian to pick his crops faced persecution from the Irish King.   The Irish  needed a subtle symbol to let others know that they welcomed Christians and that the light of Jesus shined within them.   They came up with the idea of taking a pumpkin and carving a smiling face on it.   They then placed a candle inside the pumpkin and placed it in the window.

The Irish named this pumpkin Jack of the Light or the Americanized version, “Jack O’ Lantern”.   Nowadays, pumpkins are carved into the most grotesque and hideous shapes imaginable and the original meaning of the Jack O’Lantern has been lost.   This Halloween if you carve a pumpkin with your children I hope you’ll tell them the story of how the Jack O’Lantern saved Christianity in Ireland–one of the most Christian nations in the world today.

Movies like Groundhog Day have helped to secularize Candlemas.

Like many people this season I enjoyed the heartwarming story of how Christianity’s message was spread using the Christmas Carrol The Twelve Days of Christmas.  There are a lot of seemingly secular holidays and traditions in our society that have a Christian tradition behind them.  In the middle ages Christians throughout Europe were persecuted and in many countries the teaching of Christian doctrine was forbidden.  The Christians of the time being men and women of good faith looked for a way to pass the story of Christ’s resurrection down to their children.

The day which the Europeans called Candlemas Day was full of symbolism.  For those of you that need a refresher, on February 2nd the groundhog comes out of his burrow and looks around.  If he sees his shadow there will be 6 more weeks of winter.  If not there will be an early Spring.  This story was used to teach children of how Christ exited the tomb after 40 days.  Those 40 days are represented by the 6 weeks.  The shadow represents the shadow of sin.  Of course Spring represents the new life that Jesus calls us all to.

I suppose the obvious question is why a groundhog?  The groundhog was chosen because the European groundhog is considered a noble animal and the combination of white and gray fur can sometimes give the appearance of a robe like Jesus’s burial robes.  Also, the early Christians needed an animal that hibernated and the only two animals native to Europe that hibernate are the bear and the groundhog and you sure wouldn’t want to be waking up a bear for this.

For many centuries, European Christians used this holiday on February 2nd to keep their faith alive in the face of great persecution.  When the earliest settlers came to Pennsylvania they brought Candlemas with them.  Unfortunately, much like in our own times there was a battle over Candlemas between those for whom it was a sacred religious holiday and those who wanted to call it Groundhog Day and remove all religious significance from the day.  Sadly, Groundhog Day won that war and much of Candlemas’s religious significance was lost.   My goal is this year to remind everybody of the religious significance of Candlemas.

An AP Poll that came out yesterday shows that McCain has rapidly made up Obama’s once seemingly insurmountable lead and now stands on the precipice of a victory November 4th.  As reporters were simply announcing that McCain had narrowed the gap to a slim 1% Obama lead, I looked beyond the polls and found that things are looking even better for McCain in 12 days.

The great news for John McCain is an amazing surge of evangelical Christians in this country.  In the AP poll 45% of respondents and 44% of likely voters identified themselves as evangelical Christians.  In the 2004 election, where the Christian right is largely credited for their superior grass roots effort to win the White House for Bush, evangelicals made up 23% of the total vote.  In 2000, that total was at 14% in exit polls.  This near doubling of the number of evangelicals in this country is amazing news for the McCain campaign who is clearly outpolling Obama with this group.

Now that we have this sudden doubling of the Christian right in this country, expect a large Republican victory in the congressional elections too.  This huge growth proves the power of committed monogomous married life to create new Republicans.

McCain is still winning with the "real" military.

Yesterday, McCain spokesperson Nancy Pfotenhauer appeared on MSNBC (Mostly Shady News By Cooks) to explain that while Obama may be leading in Virginia, the McCain campaign continues to win in “Real Virginia”.  She went on to define real Virginia as the part of the state outside of Northern Virginia which is more Southern in nature.  I wonder if it isn’t time to separate Democratic strongholds Alexandria and Arlington counties from the rest of the state.

Today, Colin Powell endorsed Obama.  I’m not really surprised, but I do believe that the McCain campaign will win the “real military”.  I know that the military has been donating more to the Obama campaign than the McCain campaign, but I bet that comes mostly from a couple elitist officers.  I’d take a real American hero like Joe the Plumber over Powell or General “We Should Talk to Our Enemies” Petraeus.

I admire Sarah Palin’s Wasilla church for their efforts to pray away the gay and turn sinful homosexuals into good Christian folks, but I think this effort is too limiting.  I continue my quest for a 21-28 year old attractive professional Christian conservative woman.  With my daughter Emily experimenting with liberal politics, I think she could use a role model too.  I’d like to encourage my Christian readers to begin praying that such a woman will come into my life.  I would be especially thankful if you could pray that she not be fat and has a significant income of her own.