That’s Right Nate

It must be very tempting for Democrats to look at their large numbers in congress and try to ram a health care reform bill through without compromise.   I suggest that instead, they learn a lesson from Charles Darwin.  Charles Darwin is a controversial figure whose theory of evolution struggles to gain acceptance over 100 years since he first discovered it.  The reason why is that he refused to compromise.

Christians Believe:

1. God created us out of his love
2. The Earth is 6,000 years old
3. The same plants and animals on this planet were always here
4. The Earth was created in 7 days.

Darwinists Believe:

1. The Earth was created by a big bang
2. The Earth is 4,500,000,000 years old
3. Plants and animals have evolved into their present form
4. The Earth was created over many millions of years.

What if Darwin had compromised.  Christians obviously would have been sticklers on the Earth being created by God, that it took 7 days, and that the Earth is 6,000 years old.  However, the rest of creation would be open to discussion.  If Darwin had compromised he would have had a much more successful theory of evolution that went something like this, “God created the Earth with love and a big bang.  The Earth is 6,000 years ago.   The first life on the planet were single celled organisms that evolved over the next 7 days into life as we know it.”   This is a theory that I believe the entire country, including Texas, would have accepted.

The Democrats must learn this lesson and compromise on health care.   I know it’s easy to see your own ideas as the best, but that sort of attitude will not bring you acceptance.  Democrats want a public option for people to get their health insurance from the government.   Republicans do not.  Let’s compromise and create a public option, but make it so horrible that nobody would ever take it.  Democrats want to limit the profits insurance companies make.  Republicans do not.   Let’s compromise and limit their profits to twice what their current profits are now.   That way, they would never hit the limit.

The reason America was able to avoid Civil War for almost 100 years was because of forward thinking people adopting the 3/5 compromise and later the Missouri Compromise.  Does the Democratic party have statesmen like this today? Compromise is the key to making health care policy that is acceptable to lobbyists on all sides.   I hope that the Democrats learn this leason before they wind up in history’s where are they now file like Charles Darwin.

Today, Pennsylvania Senator Arlen Specter became a Democrat.   Actually, that’s not quite right.   In my mind he always was a Democrat.  Specter, who voted for Obama’s bloated stimulus package, has time and again failed to live up to the values that make our party great—discipline and the ability to vote no to stuff that Obama proposes.  He had no right to leave the party just because we were trying to get a more conservative politician to run against him in the Republican primary.  The people of Pennsylvania voted for a Republican Senator and that’s what they deserve.   The good news is we have managed to purge our party of all but two disenting voices—The Laverne and Shirley of the Capitol Olympia Snowe and Susan Collins of Maine.

Now personally this may be good for Specter.   He probably gains a chance to return to Washington for another term, but what does he lose?   To answer that, I composed a list of those things that any good Republican would miss about the GOP:

10. Rush Limbaugh’s producer’s voice mail number

9. Michael Steele’s Def Conservative Poetry on C-Span 8

8. David Vitter’s porn collection

7. Immunity from Michelle Bachman’s “He’s probably a Muslim” list

6. Senate Tea Bagging Parties (Wow that never gets old)

5. Weekly Shirts vs. Skins basketball games

4. Being on the same side as Joe Lieberman I think.  Wait, no actually hmm yeah.   I think that they’re on opposite sides. I can’t keep track.

3. Making up fake notes from John McCain to pass to Lindsey Graham

2. Hiding Jim Bunning’s briefcase and pretending to help him look for it.

1. Invitations to Rupert Murdoch’s September 19th Talk Like a Pirate Day Party

The Republicans will survive.  We will remain a big tent party because of all the people who are economic policies now have living with their families in big tents.  Mister Specter on the other hand, let’s just say its his loss.

I remember when my daughter was in first grade.  She ran out of school crying.  I asked her why and she told me that Poopy Head had called her a name.  Now, I knew some of the people in her class, but I had no idea who Poopy Head was.   It turns out it was a boy named Brett who had made fun of her.  She was so upset that she couldn’t call him by his name anymore so she started calling him Poopy Head.

I totally can relate.   Today, as a party we are stepping forward to do exactly the same thing.  In an email sent out to 168 RNC members on Wednesday, RNC committeeman James Bopp stated, “The proposed resolution acknowledges that and calls upon the Democrats to be truthful and honest with the American people by renaming themselves the Democrat Socialist Party.  Just as President Reagan’s identification of the Soviet Union as the ‘evil empire’ galvanized opposition to communism, we hope that the accurate depiction of the Democrats as a Socialist Party will galvanize opposition to their march to socialism.”

I think this idea has a lot of merit to it.   Don’t forget the Bush’s huge foreign policy success achieved by using the moniker Axis of Evil.  As any Captain and Tennille fan will tell you  a catchy name goes a very long way.   Look how well we did calling torture harsh interrogation.   The only problem is I wonder how many people even know what a socialist is anymore.   I think we may be better off calling them the Stinky Party or the Stupid Party.  Maybe the Stinky Stupids.  I definitely think that we should stop calling ourselves the Republicans.  Like Blackwater, when your reputation gets tarnished enough it may be time to change your name.  I really like the sound of the Guns and God Party.

I believe what everybody in this country wants right now is a stimulus package that is so badly designed and bloated with ridiculous earmarks that Republicans and Democrats can join together to vote against it. I’ve seen the videos of Republicans reaching out to Democrats this past week trying to get them to join us in our condemnation of the Obama plan. I applaud them for putting statesmanship over politics.

Unfortunately, the Democrats refuse to budge. During the vote in the House very few of them were willing to join us in unity by voting against Obama’s bill. Now that it has reached the Senate it feels like the problem has grown bigger. It is important that we do not let the truly awful be the enemy of the merely objectionable. We have done a great job opposing Obama on this. It is important that in arguing for more tax cuts that we do not cave in and agree to pass this bill. If we can’t get the Democrats to go along with us, we will have to stand alone in vilifying Obama’s stimulus plan. Let’s not let our desire to have Democrats condemn the bill with us lead us to a compromise.

Wow!  I can scarcely contain myself.  Even though we took home over 2 dozen Natie Awards for blogging excellence this year, this is my proudest day since the dark days of early November.  Long time readers will recall that on election night this past year I suffered a very frightening panic attack.   The next day I was visited by the ghost of Ronald Reagan and I swore to him that I would help rebuild the Republican party by holding the Democrats’ feet to the fire.  Now that I have reached 150,000 visitors I really feel like we have started to do just that.

Your support and admiration over the past 3 dark months have helped boost my spirit in the same way I have boosted the spirti of the 150,000 patriots who have visited this blog.   I promise to you today that we will rebuild this party into the kind of party Ronald Reagan could be proud of . Furthermore, because so many of my readers are international, I will continue to extend the hand of brotherhood and to treat you like any other American.  I saw on google that my readers were mostly women and I can promise you all that I will continue to be chick friendly.  Also, to the lovely ladies who post here if you know any attractive conservative evangelicals who are financially secure, between the ages of 21-28 and willing to relocate to Chicago how about hooking me up?

Ronald McDonald clowns around with Mario the Plumber

With so many Obama supporters expected at the polls tomorrow, The Democratic National Committee has worked out a deal with participating McDonalds to allow any registered Democrats to vote at their local McDonalds restaurant from 7PM until Midnight.  Any Democrats who vote at McDonalds will also receive a free Extra Value Meal of their choice.  This is great news for Democratic voters who now don’t have to fight long lines to vote before 7PM when us Republicans are stuck voting.  In fact, I can’t think of any reason why Democrats shouldn’t all jump at the chance and wait until at least 9PM when lines have died down to go vote at McDonalds.  Please, I’m begging you.  Go vote at McDonalds.  Please!!!

REPUBLICANS – YOU MUST VOTE AT YOUR REGULAR POLLING PLACE!!

A lot of the current economic crisis is being blamed on George Bush and Republicans like John McCain.  However, nothing is further from the truth.  In fact, the credit crisis was caused by Bill Clinton and the Democrats back in 1994.    It was then that Bill Clinton signed a bill to promote low income home ownership.   I am not really sure how the Republican majorities in congress let this bill get through.

Over the next 14 years, the Republicans ascended into power and simply forgot about the bill.  Even when they controlled both houses of Congress and the Presidency they had either important issues to take care of.  When the economic crisis finally hit the Republican Senators were like “Oh no they di’nt.  I thought you fixed that sh**.”  And the Republicans in the House were like, “No dog.  I thought you did.” And then they were both like “Aw sh**”.

The way that this situation caused the economic crisis is pretty simple.  Say a poor inner city couple bought a house when they had no business doing so.  Let’s say the house cost $80,000 and they put up $5,000 up front.  As a crack whore the woman had a fairly steady income.  However, her husband was finding the carjacking market frustrating.  After a year or so, they stop paying the mortgage even though they owe $72,000 on the loan.

Unfortunately, the property value has dropped and the house is now only worth $70,000.  The bank reposesses the house, but they’re losing money on the deal.  It is easy to see how financial institutions could lose $100,000,000,000 a piece on mortgages like this.  The sad thing is banks are just too trusting.  Too often they put the public good above making money and the shrewd hustlers of the inner city will always take advantage of it.

BREAKING NEWS

Hillary Clinton just gave an extremely halfhearted attempt at creating Democratic unity tonight.  I guess acting is yet another thing the ice queen can’t do.  Hopefully, those of you who are Hillary supporters out there will have seen through her thin charade and continue to support John McCain.   A lot of forced smiles but not a lot of real support.  Let’s go Pumas and Cougars, we’ve got a maverick to elect!  Still in Pueblo where the ice machine is way too loud. There is no better way to make the Democratic establishment regret not taking you seriously as a voter than to praise your candidat’es speech while ignoring the mean of that speech and throwing your support 100% behind the campaign of somebody who is the antithesis of what she has been fighting for her whole life. You know a wise man once told this joke, “Did you hear the one about the woman who is attacked on the street by a gorilla, beaten senseless, raped repeatedly and left to die?” The punch line: “When she finally regains consciousness and tries to speak, her doctor leans over to hear her sigh contently and to feebly ask, “Where is that marvelous ape?” The moral of the story of course is if you’re going to get raped anyway, you may as well enjoy it.

Before Obama nominated Joe Biden to be his Vice-President he was very clear about his theory of leadership saying, ““I’m going to want somebody with integrity; I’m going to want somebody with independence, who’s willing to tell me where he thinks or she thinks I’m wrong; and I’m, I’m going to want somebody who shares a vision of the country where we need to go, that we’ve got to fundamentally change not only our policies, but how our politics works, how business is done in Washington. “

This is simply a strategy for getting nothing done.  The White House has been run very successfully for the past 8 years by having a President at the top of the food chain and underlings who would follow his lead.  The President cannot tolerate disension.  When Bush would tell an Antonio Gonzalez or a Donald Rumsfeld to jump they would not only jump they’d race to be the first person to tell the President what an excellent idea jumping was.  This mindset allows the President to do what’s best free of the distraction of disension.

That’s why when McCain spokesman Douglas Holtz-Eakin, McCain’s chief economic adviser, says things like “[McCain] has certainly I’m sure said things in town halls” that don’t jibe perfectly with his written plan. But that doesn’t mean it’s official” its fine because McCain has a large group of advisers who can speak for him.  They have what experts call a group mindset.  This is the most effective way to carry out public policy.

Another president followed Obama’s strategy.  Abraham Lincoln was known for putting his biggest rivals into his cabinet.  We know what happenned with Lincoln–this country had a disastrous civil war.  Sounds like a great plan Barack.  You do that.

Wow, thank goodness he didn’t win the primary.  After Slick Willie another adulterer in the White House is just what we needed.  I hope people are paying attention to this.  You never hear about Republicans having affairs like this.  I think that’s the difference between the two parties–integrity.  Of course it is easy for somebody like Obama to be a flip-flopper.  Democrats don’t even take their wedding vows seriously.  When McCain gives his ward on something you know its his bond.

Maybe that’s why the Democrats are so in favor of gay marriage–because they don’t take marriage seriously in the first place.  I think those Democrats in public office need to make a choice.  Do you wish to stand with the adulterers like Clinton, Edwards, and Obama or do you wish to join those with family values like John McCain and George Bush.

For those few Democrats that want to uphold the sanctity of the American family, I reccomend getting onboard with Congressmen like David Vitter and Larry Craig who are co-sponsoring S.J. Res 43–a joint resolution to propose a Constitutional amendment to  limit marriage to a relationship between one man and one woman.  I say its about time.  This is a culture war and the sides are clearly drawn.