That’s Right Nate

It’s been a long time since I posted, but sometimes something in the media draws you in and compels you to comment.  This is one of those times for me.   I am posting with a message of hope.  There’s been some disturbing news about young people lately and as a role model I want you to know that it gets better.

A lot of celebrities have been reaching out to gay youth to let them know that their better days are ahead.   I don’t think there’s anything that I can say that Tim Gunn, Kathy Griffin, or Sarah Silverman haven’t said.  Instead I want to talk to those teens and young adults who have felt it necessary to attack their classmates.  Right now you’re in a lot of trouble at school probably and people are publicly scorning you because you’ve attacked somebody just because they’re different from you, but I want you to know–it gets better.

About 11% Americans identify themselves as belonging to the tea party.  That’s about 1 out of 9.  Even if you’re in a really liberal state like Massachusetts or California, there are probably a bunch of tea party members living right by you.  The point is, you’re not alone.   Join the Young Republicans or go to a tea party.  You can find friends at the National Organization for Marriage website.   You’ll be surprised how much support you’ll find.   It does get better.

As a teen when you haze, or punch, or name call the liberal school system will try to punish you for your intolerance.  As an adult when you work to prevent gay people from getting married, joining the military, or otherwise enjoy the rights of the rest of the population, you’ll be praised for your family values.  Better huh?  Calling a gay kid a fag may get you a detention in school, but David Barton is considered a man of God for pushing that homosexuality be regulated by the government as an unsafe practice.

So hang in there.  Don’t get desperate.  It’ll get easier.  Start cleaning up your image and maybe you can run for congress and then really have some fun.   The future’s ahead of you and it’s great.

In 2005, with the liberal and homosexual agendas making huge inroads in Texas, the state found itself in increasing danger of a referendum making gay marriage legal and ending life as they know it in the lone star state forever.   Now Texans, don’t cotton to those kind of changes and they sure don’t take them lying down.   A referendum was overwhelmingly passed that not only banned gay marriage, but also declared, “This state or a political subdivision of this state may not create or recognize any legal status identical or similar to marriage.”

The state of Texas had spoken.  In order to prevent homosexuals from getting married, the state would no longer recognize marriage of any kind.  This was the ultimate act of self-sacrifice for many longtime married couples in the state.  It must have been quite a shock for a lot of children in the state to learn that not only were their parents not married, but neither were their grandparents.  When asked for comment,  Jerry Strickland, a representative for the Texas Attorney General said, “The Texas Constitution and the marriage statute are entirely constitutional. We will continue to defend both in court.”

Kelly Shackelford, president of the Liberty Legal Institute in Plano explained the language was designed to be broad enough to prevent the creation of domestic partnerships, civil unions or other arrangements that would give same-sex couples many of the benefits of marriage.  In fact, it prevents two lesbians and two gay men from engaging in heterosexual marriages and then simply swapping partners to get around legal restrictions.

As a non-Texan I can only admire this kind of bravery.  It reminds me of the scorched Earth techniques used to frustrate Napoleon and later Hitler.   By sacrificing their own marriages Texas has struck a blow to defend the sanctity of those very marriages that they can no longer have.   I believe there is a lesson here for the rest of us.

First, a word of caution to all the father’s out there.   If your daughter gives you a permission slip to join the pom team at her school, make sure the ink hasn’t smeared before calling the school as an irate parent.   Pornography has been in the news this week so I guess that might be part of the problem.

Tom Coburn’s chief of staff, Michael Schwartz gave a speech for the Value Voters Summit last week that explained, “All pornography is homosexual pornography because all pornography turns your sexual drive inwards…Now, think about that. And if you tell an 11-year-old boy about that, do you think he’s going to want to get a copy of Playboy? I’m pretty sure he’ll lose interest. That’s the last thing he wants! You know, that’s a good comment, it’s a good point, and it’s a good thing to teach young people.”

This immediately brought a couple of questions to my mind:

1. If you read Playbody, but only the articles, will that turn you bisexual?
2. If somebody was already gay, would watching porn make them straight more efficiently than the current deprogramming methods?

However, what this really did for me is to make me feel even more sympathy for Carrie Prejean, the former Miss California USA contestant.   You see, Carrie is most famous for coming out against gay marriage at the Miss USA pageant that she totally would have won otherwise.  At the time liberals like Perez Hilton tried to make her out to be some kind of bigot, but her story is much more complex.

“I am a Christian, and I am a model. Models pose for pictures, including lingerie and swimwear photos,” explained Miss Prejean when a half dozen racy pictures of her surfaced.  Carrie looks amazingly attractive in those pictures and I can’t help, but think that many an 11 year old boy could spend a considerable amount of time studying them.  The problem is, as Michael Schwartz explained, this act will make them gay.   At which point, Miss Prejean will oppose their marriage.   I certainly don’t approve of the lifestyle, but I can’t help think that this is hypocritical when she helped to cause the gay lifestyle in the first place.

I hate to be an I told you so, but I warned this would happen.   A recent Des Moines Register poll concluded that 8% of Iowans have had their lives dramatically and irrevocably altered by the state’s legalization of gay marriage.

As Iowa becomes a homosexual paradise, it will only be a short period of time until dance clubs begin to open from Des Moines to Cedar Rapids and Prada replaces flannel in the local malls.  The only piece of good news that I saw was that even though only 4% of Iowans said that gay marriage had a negative impact on their lives, 35% of the state strongly opposes gay marriage.   It’s nice to see that the moral members of the state aren’t going to let the lack of impact on their own lives to voice their strong opposition to gay marriage.

As others have pointed out, gay marriage is a slippery slope that will inevitably lead to legalized child molestation, people marrying furniture, and Anglicans.   I urge the state to come to their senses and stand against this abomination despite the fact that for 92% of you, it in no way has any impact whatsoever on your life.

Call me a feminist, but life isn’t easy for young women nowadays, especially courageous conservative and outspoken women like Carrie Prejean and Bristol Palin.   Both of them were just callously attacked, by rich and powerful men.   That’s why I’m dedicating today’s blog is being dedicated to their courageous struggles.

Being an unwed teenage mother is very difficult.  Add to it the responsibilities of being an advocate for sexual abstinence and you can see that Bristol  Palin has her work cut out for her.   That’s why David Letterman’s joke about her being knocked up by Alex Rodriguez is not the least bit funny.    I’m not talking about the fact that Alex Rodriguez is Hispanic.  I have always believed that when a Mexican or other Latino makes over a certain amount of money, they’re really no different than European Spaniards.   Instead, it is because of the age difference.   Alex Rodriguez is nearly 30 years old.   Even Todd Palin wasn’t out of his teens when he married Sarah Palin.  It is offensive to believe Bristol would have anything to do with somebody nearly 30.  Furthermore, all the Palin kids practice abstinence and Bristol has probably gotten awfully good at it by now.

This also has to be a horrible time to be Miss California nowadays.  With the state’s economy in trouble, there are few grand openings calling for ribbon cutting.   Being singled out by the powerful homosexual agenda complicates things even further.   Let’s face it, when Carrie came out for opposite marriage, she was painting a big rainbow bulls eye on her back.  Now she is being fired as Miss California by Donald Trump after she didn’t fulfill the terms of her contract or tell the pageant people where she was or what she was doing.   There is of yet no word on whether or not she’ll have to return the implants, but you can be sure they’re going to want the tiara back.

If there is one thing I’ve learned from being subjected to chick flicts, its that women who are abused by men and left powerless, will do desperate things to try and reclaim their freedom.  This may mean seducing the pool boy or it may mean a cross country shooting spree.   We must not let these women feel that they are out of options.   I hope that Bristol will continue to be an effective campaigner for abstinence long after Alex Rodriguez has hung up his spikes.  Carrie Prejean is a natural as a Fox News anchor.   Let’s open up doors to these women because when they get angry enough they’ll be knocking them down.  In some ways, their issues crossover.  If gay people would just refrain from having sex, would gay marriage really be necessary?

I’ve been feeling sorry for Paul Potts lately.   In 2007, he was the ugly guy with the amazing operatic voice that took Britain’s Got Talent by storm.   As often happens with these things, he was replaced a few years later by an even uglier and equally talented person in Susan Boyle.   If you believe in evolutionary theory, England should continue to get uglier and more talented in the years to come.

I think what made Paul Potts and Susan Boyle such big sensations is that people couldn’t believe ugly people could be talented.   I think Carrie Prejean had a similar effect on people who did not believe a beautiful person could wax so eloquently on highly moral matters like opposite marriage.    Even Donald Trump said about her answer, “if her beauty wasn’t so great, nobody would have cared.”  I’d like to believe that Donald Trump let her keep her crown as Miss California USA for all the right reasons, but the truth is the pageant had already spent consider money on her breasts and they knew they were never going to get that money back.  I think they just didn’t want to throw good money after bad.

N0w, some of you are going to say, “but she posed for racy photos.   She’s not fit to be Miss California.”  However, is there really a better way to prostelitize for a heterosexual lifestyle?   What Carrie did was to sacrifice her dignity for the chance that gay men might see her lovely female form and be drawn to heterosexuality.  This is a woman who is beautiful, but stands up for her beliefs just like Anita Bryant before her.   I think there is a future for Miss Prejean as a Fox News anchor and if that is her dream, I truly hope she pursues it.  After all, there will be another beauty queen last year and she will become yesterday’s news the way that Paul Potts did.  She should strike while the iron is hot.

This map shows how I would divide gay marriage and non-gay marriage states. The West would be set aside as territories.

In  my article on Miss USA, I promised that today I would present my compromise idea for gay marriage.  Well, here it is.  I think this would eliminate a lot of trouble.

One of the biggest misconceptions about Republicans is that we hate gays.  We don’t.  We simply hate their disgusting and grotesque immoral behavior not the gays themselves.   They cut our hair, decorate our homes, and play lovable sidekicks on our situation comedies.  In fact, there is a group called the Log Cabin Republicans made up of a handful of gay Republicans who shared a cabin together one summer.   We may only have a handful of gays voting for us, but we do have those guys.  We love the sinner, not the sin.

I have been trying to come up with a solution to the whole gay marriage thing so that as a country we can move past it and I think I may have found one.   Let’s face the facts.   Gays really can’t get married no matter what we call it.  It’ll always be different from our opposite marriages.  That doesn’t mean their relationships shouldn’t get some sort of protection.   Even in states that allow gay marriage, homosexual couples actually have to file 2 different tax forms–one as a couple for the state and then seperately for the federal government.  If there is one thing Republicans hate, its complicated income tax.

I decided that gay marriage should count for something.   I guess its better than half a marriage, but how much?  It certainly isn’t worth 75% of a marriage.  I decided in an admittedly arbitrary way that a gay marriage should count for 3/5 of a marriage.   If one gay spouse dies, their partner would be eligible for 60% of survivor benefits.  They would be able to visit a partner in the hospital, but only 60% of the time.  Couples could file jointly, but their savings would only be at 60%.  In this way we recognize their sinful and repulsive relationship and don’t hold it up to the same status as opposite marriage.

I would also suggest that since the states that allow gay marriage are in the North, we should set a line at the Arkansas and Missouri border.  Anything South of that line should not allow gay marriage.  Anything North of that line should allow it, but only as 60% of a marriage.  I guess we would have to have wacko left coast states allow the 60% marriage and it wouldn’t fly in the mountain west at all.   This great 3/5 compromise will allow us to get on with other important issues.  It is an idea whose times has come.

This past Sunday was the Miss USA pageant and like I have for the past 10 or 15 years I have a Miss USA ritual.  I put on my pajamas and my fuzzy slippers and I on my comfortable chair with a pint of Haagen-Dazs ice cream and watch the whole thing from start to finish.  This year I have to admit I think I witnessed a robbery.  Miss California Carrie Prejean had everything going for her–a big smile, an up with people attitude, and a slightly anorexic figure that gave you a good glimpse of her ribcage.  Then she got a question from blogger and well known homosexual Perez Hilton:

Perez Hilton: “Vermont recently became the 4th state to legalize same-sex marriage. Do you think every state should follow suit. Why or why not?”

Prejean: “Well,  I think it’s great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage. And you know what, in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense to anybody out there, but that’s how I was raised and that’s how I think it should be between a man and a woman. Thank you very much.”

As you can see Prejean didn’t come out against gay marriage as much for opposite marriage.   She came out for this great country where we can choose who we will allow to get married and who we won’t.  I thought this was a very positive message of inclusion, but unfortunately, that’s not how it was taken.  The gay agenda was quickly mobilized against Ms. Prejean and she went down in flames.

“It did cost me my crown,” Prejean continued. “It is a very touchy subject and [Hilton] is a homosexual, and I see where he was coming from and I see the audience would’ve wanted me to be more politically correct. But I was raised in a way that you can never compromise your beliefs and your opinions for anything.”

I believe that if nothing else, we look to our pageant contestants to stand up for their political beliefs.   We might not agree with them when they say who can get married or who can use what water fountain, but we should respect their beliefs. Charmaine Koonce, the mother of Miss New Mexico USA Bianca Matamoros-Koonce, supported Ms. Prejean saying, “In the Bible it says marriage is between Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!”

I checked and she is right.  There is no Steve in the Book of Genesis and I think that other than the whole shame, getting kicked out of Paradise, and one of their sons killing the other one, Adam and Eve are the type of relationship that everybody should aspire to.  Despite her obvious correctness, the whole Miss USA thing got me thinking and I think I have found a solution to the entire problem of gay marriage in this country.  On Thursday, I will present on this very blog what I call the 60% solution to gay marriage.

What is often lost in discussions over single payer health care is the right of doctors to choose who they will provide medical treatment to and who they will not because they disapprove of their lifestyle.  There is an amazing new commercial out now by an anti-gay marriage group called NOM.   At first, I believed that their name came because they were planning on a long quagmire of a fight that they were pretty sure they would lose, but hoped that they could somehow get a negotiatied settlement because they feared homosexuality spreading, but in reality it stands for National Organization for Marriage.  Obviously, they don’t know my ex.

In the commercial, the woman who plays the California doctor  says, “I’m a California doctor who must choose between my faith and my job.”  Wow, that’s a powerful statement.  I began to think about why a doctor would have to choose between being a doctor and being a person of faith.  I thought of religious issues that might conflict a doctor.   Maybe the doctor believes abortion is murder or that birth control is a sin.   Then again, gay people really don’t need either of those things.   The doctor could be against euthenasia and have a patient with a do not resuscitate order, but that wouldn’t really be strictly a homosexual thing.  I suppose if the doctor was a Christian Scientist and believed that treating patients was sinful that could cause problems too.

It occurred to me that what this woman objected to could only be treating homosexuals and I imagine for some religions, it may be considered immoral to provide medical care to somebody who is living what you perceive as an immoral lifestyle.  A doctor should always have the right to refuse to treat patients that they believe are immoral, rude, or just creepy.   I refuse to go along with a society that demands that just because you show up at an emergency room with a gaping chest wound you must receive treatment.   How do they know that your chest wound wasn’t the result of a jealous husband shooting you when he caught you having an affair with his wife?  We must get big government out of medicine and let doctors treat those patients that they want to or don’t want to.   Haven’t we lived under the tyranny of the liberals demanding that everybody get medical treatment regardless of how they’ve lived their lives for long enough?

Oh Iowa, what have you done?  Will the rest of this country ever be able to look at a bunch of smartly clad men walking out of your cornfields together in the same way ever again?  Through a series of stunning movies, the state has clearly asserted itself as the Midwest’s center for debauchery much like California is in the West and New York in the East.  First they helped put Barack Obama on the national scene in the Democrat caucus, now they have legalized gay marriage,  and I bet there are other things too.

I apologize if I come off as angry today, it is just that I love this country and this isn’t the way it is supposed to happen.   The courts aren’t supposed to legislate.  That is the job of the people.  Does anybody really believe that at least some of the Southern states would have desegregated schools by now if the courts hadn’t intervened in the 1950s?  The courts do nothing for us, but cause trouble and strife.

What you’re get in Iowa now is a bunch of gays.  I don’t really have a problem with gay people, but there will be obvious changes to the state almost immediately.  Des Moines will no longer be pronounced (Damoyns), but will soon by called (Day Mwa).  Eventually, the entire state will be turned into a little Sadam or Gamoran right in the middle of our heartland.  Do we really believe Iowa’s trademark farmer’s tan can survive this?   Iowa was built by men who rarely had sex with their wives, let alone each other.

What I suspect happens is that you’ve got these people and we’ll they’re Christians.  They’re good people, they try to raise their kids the right way and all of that.   Then one day Jimmy gets bored of going to church and wanders into a gay pride parade.  He’s intrigued by the music and the bright colors and he starts to question his own sexuality.  Before long he’s starting to notice that other men are attractive and within a year or two he’s on top of a float in a gay pride parade dressed like one of the Village People.

We need to put a stop to this and hit Iowa where it hurts.  According to the Made in Iowa website, their number one seller is the Iowa Country Barn Burner Mustard made by the Dennison Mustard Company of Western Iowa.  Until the God fearing people of Iowa put a ban back on gay marriage I’m calling on my readers to quit using all Dennison Mustard Company products.  If we really make it hurt in the wallet, Iowa will come to its senses.