That’s Right Nate

I have posted before that if we’re serious about turning the Republican Party around we need to get more elite. Our brand has to be like the Navy Seals or limited edition Precious Moments figurines. By cutting the number of Republicans way down, we can create a demand for us that will only serve us well in future elections. Obviously, Republicans in name only (RINOs) like Colin Powell, Olympia Snow, and the McCains need to hit the road, but who are the other threats to our party from within.

7. Rick Perry – When he ran for governor, he promised to secure the Texas / mexico border. As soon as he was elected, he totally reneged on the promise.
He also got a new business tax approved that was supposed to relieve residential property tax payers of their crushing taxes. Not only are business paying taxes they didn’t have to pay prior to 2008, homeowners are paying more property tax.

6. Pete Sessions – As head of the RNCC was complicit in allowingrampant RINOism to spread.

5. Lindsay Graham – His last opponent in the South Carolina Republican primary had a campaign slogan that “Lindsay Graham is too liberal for South Carolina.” I think he went even further over the top when he had a disgustingly kiss kis press conference showing his support for Obama.

4. Mitch McConnell – Was in favor of a stimulus package and big government spending

3. Nancy Reagan – She’s pro-stem cell research, she was a big McCain supporter in the primary over legitimate conservatives, and she has become an embarrassment to her husband’s legacy.

2. Newt Gingrich – He’s been making the round on liberal networks to attack Rush and Dick Cheney for their strident defense of America.

1. Dick Cheney - Though it pains me to admit it, Cheney is a big government liberal at heart. That can’t be changed by simply waterboarding a few terrorists.

Simply, by getting rid of these 7 pseudo Republicans, our party will become stronger. Let’s not waste time showing them them the door.

It was a proud day for the Republican Party when Michael Steele was named as chairman of the RNC.  He had plenty of experience before this as Maryland Lieutenant Governor and before that as bass player for the Runaways and Bangles  in the 1980s.  Now, Steele has issued a challenge to the Republican party.  In an interview in the Washington Times Steele said, “We need messengers to really capture that region — young, Hispanic, black, a cross section … We want to convey that the modern-day GOP looks like the conservative party that stands on principles. But we want to apply them to urban-surburban hip-hop settings.”

All I have to say to Mr. Steele’s challenge is “Fo Schizzle”.   Now that I have become a Youtube celebrity I’ve been looking for a followup video and what some of you may not know is that I wrote an amazing rap that was the hit of the Great Lakes Region Independent Self-Storage Operator convention for 2006.  If I can make self-storage hip by mixing it with a little somethin’ somethin’, just think what I can do for the GOP and I’m not the only one.  This is a job for MC Karl Rove.  Michael Steele is right, it isn’t our ideas that are wack, its the way we’re frontin.   By this time next week I hope to have a followup video that captures the potential of the Republican Party for the hiphop community.

You down with GOP?
Yeah, you know me!

The Dynamic Limbaugh is the prescription for winning the women's vote in 2012

There was an excellent open  letter on Politico the other day from John Feehery to new Republican Party head honcho Rush Limbaugh.  In it, he asks Limbaugh for his plans for us to start capturing new voter groups like women and Hispanics and capturing some of the states we have been losing lately.  I think it is a must read.   Obviously, Rush Limbaugh is only our spiritual head.  For the real nuts and bolts leadership as head of the RNC, we did what we always do when we find a job that we can’t stand–we hired a minority to do it for us.

Still, things have really been picking up for the GOP since Obama took office.  For one, Rep. Eric Cantor (R-VA) has emerged as a leader of the Republicans in the House of Representatives.  Previously, Cantor’s only real notoriety came from taking on obscenity on television.  Now not only is Cantor leading the charge to “just say no to Obama”, he’s not above a little swearing to get his point across.

Yesterday, another Republican leader Representative Steve Austria (R-OH)  jumped into the spotlight by saying what I have said all along, that FDR caused the Great Depression.  “When (President Franklin) Roosevelt did this, he put our country into a Great Depression,” Austria said of Obama’s stimulus plan. “He tried to borrow and spend, he tried to use the Keynesian approach, and our country ended up in a Great Depression. That’s just history.”  With the gift of hindsight we can see things about FDR that we are too close to see with the Obama administration.  However, it won’t surprise me if historians in the future agree that Obama was responsible for the debacle that was the early days of the Iraq war.

Having men like Limbaugh, Cantor, and Austria leading us, I have no doubt that the resurgence of the Republican party is right around the corner.  By going hard right, we might not appeal to as many voters, but we will recapture the passion and isn’t that what elections are all about?

Wow!  I can scarcely contain myself.  Even though we took home over 2 dozen Natie Awards for blogging excellence this year, this is my proudest day since the dark days of early November.  Long time readers will recall that on election night this past year I suffered a very frightening panic attack.   The next day I was visited by the ghost of Ronald Reagan and I swore to him that I would help rebuild the Republican party by holding the Democrats’ feet to the fire.  Now that I have reached 150,000 visitors I really feel like we have started to do just that.

Your support and admiration over the past 3 dark months have helped boost my spirit in the same way I have boosted the spirti of the 150,000 patriots who have visited this blog.   I promise to you today that we will rebuild this party into the kind of party Ronald Reagan could be proud of . Furthermore, because so many of my readers are international, I will continue to extend the hand of brotherhood and to treat you like any other American.  I saw on google that my readers were mostly women and I can promise you all that I will continue to be chick friendly.  Also, to the lovely ladies who post here if you know any attractive conservative evangelicals who are financially secure, between the ages of 21-28 and willing to relocate to Chicago how about hooking me up?

Sarah Palin's views on Pan-Africanism run strong.

This is going to be my last post on Sarah Palin for awhile.  The election is over and people have been picking on her way too much.  If you don’t watch it, she’ll leave and she’ll take Alaska with her.  Todd is already in a seccesionist party and she’s spoke at their convention.  Do you really think we’re going to have to push her that far for her to decide that the maverickest thing to do is just to leave?  If we want her to run in 2012, let’s just cut it out right now.  Don’t forget she’s the governor of Alaska and the state is already mad about what this country is doing to Ted Stevens.  She could take them all with her.

Palin and Pan-Africanism: The press has been so unfair to Palin over this topic.  Her views on black liberation have been mocked by the mainstream press when she is far closer to the political theories of W.E.B Du Bois and Marcus Garvey than Barack Obama ever was.  Pan-Africanism is the belief first penned by Henry Sylvester Williams that all continental Africa should unite.  Most of the African countries were formed by their colonial masters across logical ethnic, tribal, and social barriers displacing families and forming whole colonies based on one export.  Palin’s support of radical black causes was naturally mocked by the press as they do with most black radical views in favor of the more politically correct liberalism of people like Barack Obama.

Sarah Palin’s Underwear: The RNC has announced that it will be donating all of the clothing it bought for Sarah Palin to charity including her underwear.  While on paper this seems like a great idea, after all who wouldn’t be more likely to give a homeless person a dollar if she was wearing a suit from Neiman Marcus, in reality it is wasteful.  A quick search of the internets show that a pair of used underwear sells for $30.  I have to think that underwear worn by a vice-presidential candidate would fetch at least $50.  In Palin’s case you may get $100.  Have her sign them and include a certificate of authenticity and you’re probably talking $250 a crack.  Now we’re really talking about giving back to charity.

That’s it for me on Sarah Palin for awhile.  If something becomes major news I’m sure I’ll chime in, but I for one don’t want her and Todd leaving so I’m giving them a bit of privacy.

As we rebuild our party into a political force again, I am reminded of the classic television show–Charlie’s Angels.  I believe that there are 3 angels that we need to count on to win us the Presidency and take back congress in 2012.

Sarah Palin is The Candidate.  She is basically our Jaclyn Smith and not simply because they Ms. Smith has her own line of clothes and Sarah Palin is famous for her fabulous wardrobe.  Sarah is our next best chance to win the Presidency and best of all she’s a blank state.  Word has come out of the McCain camp that she thinks Africa is a country and we already knew she didn’t really know much about the Constitution.  As a result, she’s a blank slate.  We’ve got 4 years to fill her with talking points and we don’t have to worry about her having a strong opinion of her own.

Elizabeth Hasselbeck is The Journalist.  She is our Farah or Cheryl Ladd.  She’s not only beautiful, but he’s a hard hitting investigator.  Her days on The View are probably numbered, but her abilities as a reporter could be best utilized at Fox News where she could continue to take information from the internets and expose it to the millions of people watching her on television.

Michelle Bachman – A representative from Minnesota who just won reelection.  She’s our Kate Jackson.  Poor Kate wasn’t quite as pretty as the other angels and well..that’s probably enough said.  During the primaries, Michelle called for investigating all members of congress who had unamerican views and I hope she will go ahead and pursue this course.  If we can remove just a handful of Democrat Senators for being unamaerican it’ll make the next election in 2010 that much easier.

Black people like the ones at the polls in Philadelphia can be very intimidating

Now that I have come to terms with the McCain defeat, I think it is important to look at why we lost.  Only when we have properly placed the blame for our personal shortcomings can we move on.

1. The Media was unfair – Look how much you heard about the Keating Five scandal that happenned when John McCain was just a freshman senator. Then think about how rarely you heard about William Ayres.  Thank goodness for Fox.

2. Voter Intimidation – Fox spent most of Tuesday talking about possible voter intimidation at a polling place in Philadelphia by a poll worker who was also a large black man.  I’m sure that if that hadn’t happenned McCain would have won Pennsylvania.

3. 95% of black voters supported Obama as opposed to only 90% who supported John Kerry proving that they only voted for him because he’s black.

4. 46% of white voters supported Obama as opposed to only 41% who supported John Kerry proving that they voted for him because he’s white.

5. Unmarried women supported Obama 70% to 29%.  Why aren’t these women married?  As has been pointed out on other conservative sites unmarried women by their nature are sinful and seduced by the attractive black man who was running for President.  I mean not that I found him attractive or anything. (Thanks to World Net Daily on that one)

6. Obama raised too much money.  How are Republicans supposed to compete if big money is allowed to control politics?

7. Election Fraud – As the great Rush Limbaugh pointed out the Democrats nominated a bunch of moderate candidates when they’re really the party of the crazy left wing.  It made it very hard to run against them when they would hide theses crazy Democrat ideas because the candidates didn’t actually have them.

8. People don’t like plumbers.  They are usually called wen the toilet is backed up and that makes people associate them with waste matter.   McCain should have made an electrician or carpenter his focal point.  People like carpenters. That’s why God chose one to be his son’s step-father.

9. John McCain was too positive in this campaign and should have attacked Obama more.  His middle name was Hussein.  We should have made sure people knew that.  I don’t think they did.

10. Butterfly Ballots – Bring them back.  These new ballots make it harder for people to vote for Republican candidates.

This afternoon as I was wallowing in self-pity I had a dream or an apparition or a visitation.  I’m not really sure what happened, but I was visited by the ghost of Ronald Reagan.

“Whose there”, I said as I wiped the sleep out of my eyes.

“Who do you think?  Its Ronald Reagan and its about time you pull yourself up by your own bootstraps and save your party,” he said.

“Gipper?” I asked

“Well its not John Anderson.  Its morning in America and you’re in bed,” he told me.

“But..Obama won,” I said sullenly

“Well, yes he did.  You know if you locked two boys into rooms filled with horse manure,” he started.

“…Why would you do that,” I interrupted.

“Let me finish,” he said annoyed, “The pessimist would start crying, the optimist would start digging cause he knows there’s a horse in there somewhere.”

“So..I should be an optimist?” I asked

“I always was,” he said offering me a jelly bean.

“Thanks Ronald Reagan,” I said

“No, thank you and brave Americans like you.  Together we can build this party into what it once was.  I’ll need you to hold those Democrats’ feet to the fire.  That’s something only you can do Nate,” he told me.

“Am I going to be visited by 2 more spirits?” I asked

“Now isn’t that just like a liberal to send 3 people to do the job when one person is plenty,” he laughed and then he was gone.

I don’t know what happened, but I’m determined to go with what works for us.  I’ve made a 5 point plan we’re going to emphasize over the next 4 years as we rebuild:

1. Referring to people by their job like Joe the Plumber or Mike the Podiatrist.

2. Referring to our opponents by their middle name constantly.

3. Stop pronouncing the letter G.

4. Try to divide the country into Americans and unamericans.

5. Switch strategy every week.

You’ll see–it’ll all be right.