That’s Right Nate

As you know, despite living half a country from Congressman Jack Kimble’s home district in California, I have developed quite a fondness for Jack’s no nonsense approach to conservative values and good government.   He just sent me his newest campaign commercial and gave me permission to upload it to the internets.

As a loyal member of the GOP, I feel extremely embarrassed to have been hoodwinked by Michael Steele and the other members of the RNC.  I was watching The Producers tonight and it suddenly occurred to me how we lost the one party dream or Karl Rove.  When you look at the math, nobody really cares how much the losing candidate raises.  Think about it, we heard about how much was raised for Obama’s campaign, but did we ever hear how much John McCain raised?

With creative accounting, the RNC has been able to raise vast sums of money for its crooked leadership by taking donations from people like myself and then running campaigns deliberately designed to lose.  Think about what we’ve done since January—Hip Hop Republicans, Advocating Torture, Trying to rename our opponents?   These are strategies designed to lose support not garner it.  I feel very foolish not to have seen through this before.  My fellow conservatives, we’re being hoodwinked.

I have recently come across a great website called All Voices.  The site is kind of like Wickipedia, but with the exacting journalistic standards of Fox News.   Now any aspiring reporter can create their own stories and post them on the site.   Best of all, you aren’t limited by the facts.  After enough people read and support your article, it basically becomes fact.  This allows reporters to start with a good story and work their way out to find actual facts.

That’s what I did with my story, Democrats Over 8 Times More Likely to get Swine Flu.   I didn’t worry about facts, though I could certainly see how my story could be factual.  Simply by reporting it, I have credibility.  However, on the internet nothing promotes credibility like popularity.  I’d really appreciate it if you could go to my story and give it a thumbs up.   I’d like to see it really climb through the ratings and displace other potentially factual news stories.  My loyal readers, I’m asking you to please do this favor for me.

As regular readers of my blog know, I am a huge collector of Precious Moments figurines.  The ones that I truly appreciate are the rare limited edition ones.  This week, I immediately bought 6 copies of Our Love is the Bridge to Happiness.  Normally, I would only buy one for the empty spot on top of my mantle, but this particular figurine is a limited edition.  Because it is rare it is seen as a status symbol.   That’s why whenever I am flirting with a woman I never fail to mention to her about all the rare precious moment figurines I have.   Hopefully, this will one day lead to an opportunity to show that woman the figurines for herself.

Just like Precious Moments, The Republican Party has made a move in the right direction by becoming rarer itself.  We have now become an elite party.  When there were all sorts of moderates running around like Arlen Specter or Gerald Ford anybody could be a Republican.   Now, it takes strict adherence to very rigid principles that most people in public office could never do–either their empathy or their intellect would get in the way.  That is why even though we are leaner, we are now more powerful than ever.  Everybody now knows, if you’re a Republican you are elite.

Soon, people will reallize what an elite brand we are and when that happens we will be in great demand like any limited supply.  This will help us in elections because while not everybody can own a Ferrari, that won’t stop ordinary people from wanting to.   Voting Republican will be a new status symbol.  As an added bonus, we have a very unified message.   When we were larger, nearly half the party thought Bush was taking the country in the wrong direction.  Now that that half of the party is gone, I’d wager that all the remaining Republicans approve of the job Bush did or see him as too liberal.  It is much easier to stay unified and on message with a smaller group.   The moderate purge must continue until we become even more elite.  Only then can we really lead.

A friend of mine sent me this email from a Republican who is sick of what’s going on in this country.  I think a lot of us, regardless of political party will agree.  This is the kind of voice the mainstream media should be carrying when they talk about the teabag movement.  I asked my friend to send me some contact information so we may have a potential interview coming up.

The government is afraid of the guns people have because they have to have control of the people at all times. Once you take away the guns, you can do anything to the people. You give them an inch and they take a mile. I believe we are slowly turning into a socialist government. The government is continually growing bigger and more powerful, and the people need to prepare to defend themselves against government control.

Taxes are a joke. Regardless of what a political candidate “promises,” they will increase. More taxes are always the answer to government mismanagement. They mess up. We suffer. Taxes are reaching cataclysmic levels, with no slowdown in sight. Go ahead, take everything I own; take my dignity. Feel good as you grow fat and rich at my expense; sucking my tax dollars and property, tax dollars which justify your existence and pay your federal salary. Do you get it? By doing your evil job, you put me out of work. All you tyrannical mother fuckers will swing in the wind one day for your treasonous actions against the Constitution of the United States. Remember the Nuremberg War Trials. “But…but…but…I only followed orders…” Die, you spineless cowardice bastards.

I reached the decision to go on the offensive – to put a check on government abuse of power, where others had failed in stopping the federal juggernaut running amok. I wish to use the words of Justice Brandeis dissenting in Olmstead to speak for me. He wrote, “Our government is the potent, the omnipresent teacher. For good or for ill, it teaches the whole people by its example.”

Those who betray or subvert the Constitution are guilty of sedition and/or treason, are domestic enemies and should and will be punished accordingly. It also stands to reason that anyone who sympathizes with the enemy or gives aid or comfort to said enemy is likewise guilty. I have sworn to uphold and defend the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic, and I will. And I will because not only did I swear to, but I believe in what it stands for in every bit of my heart, soul and being. I know in my heart that I am right in my struggle. I have come to peace with myself, my God and my cause. Blood will flow in the streets…Good vs. Evil. Free Men vs. Socialist Wannabe Slaves. Pray it is not your blood, my friend. Is a Civil War imminent? Do we have to shed blood to reform the current system? I hope it doesn’t come to that. But it might.

A man with nothing left to lose is a very dangerous man and his energy/anger can be focused toward a common/righteous goal. What I’m asking you to do, then, is sit back and be honest with yourself. Do you have kids/wife? Would you back out at the last minute to care for the family? Are you interested in keeping your firearms for their current/future monetary value, or would you drag that ‘06 through rock, swamp and cactus…to get off the needed shot? In short, I’m not looking for talkers, I’m looking for fighters…And if you are a fed, think twice. Think twice about the Constitution you are supposedly enforcing (isn’t “enforcing freedom” an oxymoron?) and think twice about catching us with our guard down – you will lose…and your family will lose.

Update 1/09/10:  Oops folks.  I didn’t reallize at the time, but I guess this “Republican” was actually Oklahoma City bomber Timothy McVeigh.

As you can see, it wasn't until later that the Klu Klux Klan became a terrorist organization. Here they are saving Mary Pickford's honor.

Last week, the Department of Homeland Security warned that that “the recession and the election of President Obama are “fueling resurgence” of right-wing extremist groups that are seeking new recruits, especially returning veterans.”  Really?   Does anybody remember when the DHS did important stuff like letting us know what the terrorism color for the day was?  This is an outrage and one that I will not put up with from my government.  Pat Robertson got it right when he said that somebody in the DHS is either  a “convinced left winger or somebody whose sexual orientation is somewhat in question.”

Now, I will be the first to admit that after the Civil War, returning confederate Veterans were the ones who started the Klu Klux Klan and I certainly won’t deny that the KKK is a terrorist organization, but if you saw Birth of a Nation, you know it wasn’t always that way.  Sure, it was veterans like retired Marine Corps Major General Smedley Butler who were behind the attempted 1934 Coup against FDR.   I’ll even grant that Timothy McVeigh may have been a little on the conservative side when he blew up the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma.  However, McVeigh only had lose ties to some militias and wasn’t really a member of an organized group.  This is hardly a pattern of right wing violence and certainly not terrorism.

Maybe, the DHS was worried because of the Pittsbugh shootings, but nothing could be further from the truth.  Richard Andrew Poplawski was a young man convinced the nation was secretly controlled by a cabal that would eradicate freedom of speech, take away his guns and use the military to enslave the citizenry.  He despised the military.  He obviously wasn’t a veteran.  No, what the DHS case is based on is half-truths and outright lies.

I don’t have to tell you dear readers about the power of our boycotts.   We drove Dark Knight from the theaters, cut Salvation Army donations, made Alan Colmes leave Fox, and are in the middle of bringing the Iowa mustard industry to its knees.  Only Bill O’Reilly’s recent ass kicking of Spain can trump us, but I’m not yet that good.  Bill O’Reilly is an aspiration for me though.  Believe me.  Now I’m asking you to boycott the Department of Homeland Security.   It really isn’t that tough.   If you see a suspicious looking package just ignore it.  If you are in a foreign country and somebody asks you to take a package with you for one of their friends then go ahead and do it.  Don’t report suspicious people either.  We can make the DHS reallize that there is nobody that loves this country more than conservatives or veterans except for maybe conservative veterans.

Today, in Chicago we made it very clear that we won’t take  it anymore.   At noon today, half-dozens of people crowded into the plaza outside of the Kluzinski Federal Building to proudly proclaim our messages of protest.  I was there, but felt ridiculously out of place in my American Indian attire.  I just assumed that the dress code would be the same as the last one.  Fortunately, although it was cloudy, there was no rain and the weather was fine for Chicago in April.

We gathered to hear disc jockey Mancow (pictured) give an inspirational message.   As the keynote speaker he reminded us that “in the million man march, only 13 of them had jobs.”  He also didn’t sugar coat it for Obama, calling him a a “race-baiting community organizer” in the mold of “Jesse Jackson.”  I was a bit disappointed to see Mancow didn’t have Drew Peterson with him.  The two have been seen around town several times since Mancow first interviewed the suspected two time wife killer.  Even though the crowd was a bit small for a Mancow appearance he was excited and enthused to be there.  You could really feel the positive energy just below the rage, but what drew the average person there?   Fortunately, I was able to ask some of those who showed up to let Chairman Maobama what they thought of his stimulus.

I asked one guy carrying one of the Obama photoshopped into Hitler posters that were all the rage at the rally.  He looked at me a bit funny no doubt because of my attire.

“Hello sir.  Can I get your name?” I asked

“Nope,” he stated flatly, “the feds have spies everywhere.   Just call me a concerned citizen”

“Fair enough,” I replied, “Why are you here?”

“Obama’s a fascist,” he said.

“What makes you say that?” I asked.

“Cause he is,” he angrily retorted.

“So you think he wants to take away our rights?” I asked.

“Yeah, that’s what I said.   You watch.  He’s going to do away with gun ownership, private property, and elections,” he snapped.

“Well I’m glad you’re here to stand up to that,” I responded.

A man caught my eye next.  He was in his 60s and dressed like a continental soldier and he had small children with him who I assumed he rented for the occasion  holding up signs protesting the latest taxes.  I approached him and asked his name.

“My name is Ray Hogan,” He smiled.

“What brings you here?” I asked.

“I don’t want change?” he said.

“You don’t want change?” I asked

“No.  I want things back the way they used to be?”  He said.

“What do you think about taxes?” I asked

“Oh that doesn’t bother me really,” he said, “My wife takes care of that.”

“Oh OK,” I said, “I really appreciate your time.”

“You’re welcome,” he smiled, “I had nothing else to do.  I’m just watching my grand kids.”

I was off to find another person to interview when I saw a very attractive woman with long blonde hair in a gray pinstripe suit showing a lot of leg.   She was walking quickly, but I was determined to make a bee line.

“Hi,” I said

“How.” she laughed.  She continued walking, but slowed down.

“So why are you protesting?” I asked.

“Me, I’m just getting lunch.  I work in this building,” she retorted, “Is this a protest?”

“We’re having a tea party,” I responded.

“Oh I used to have those all the time when I was a girl,” she smiled.

Unfortunately, she then entered the Kluzinski Building and I had to cut the interview short, but we really seemed to have a chemistry.  I was thorougly impressed by what I saw. It was a magic day and though some of us were protesting taxes and others were protesting for gun rights or against minorities or because we wanted Chicago to secede from the country, I believe our voice was heard.  Whether you were the militia guy who told me he believes metal detectors are a threat to our rights or one of the many people I saw who wanted to go back to the gold standard, today we made history and they can’t take that away from us.

As I mentioned last week, RNC Chairman Michael Steele has called on us to change as a party.  He wants us to “convey that the modern-day GOP looks like the conservative party that stands on principles. But we want to apply them to urban-surburban hip-hop settings.”  Well sir, I have taken this call to heart and while I am no MC Rove I was amazed at how easy this rapping is.   First off, sampling is amazing.  Republicans love using songs without permission and now I can do it legally.  Now, I’m the first to admit that I’m no MC Rove, but this rapping is really just talking.

For my regular blog readers, I know that some of you may be frightened of rap.  Don’t be.  We need to reach out to people in all communities who share our views and frankly most of you are too old to really get the vibe on the street.  Even my daughter Emily pleaded with me not to post this video which she called an embarrassment, but you see she doesn’t know the urban experience–in fact I’ve spent most of her life protecting her from it.  If you don’t get it, don’t worry.  I’m trying to reach out to young black men and anybody else who is part of that hip hop culture.  Please appreciate the video for what it is.

It occurs to me that there are a lot of things that unite us Republicans to rappers.  For one thing, we love our big cars and for another we’ve both been accused of mysoginy.  Now that I have this video on the YouTubes, my next goal is to get it on the Itunes.  I’m not going to be happy until I’m in my car and I hear somebody next to me cranking it so loud that the bass is shaking my car.  That will be success so crank this baby up while I lay some dope rhymes on you.

UPDATE: There is an issue with the video sometimes showing up as not available.  At first I thought it was the man trying to keep me down or Steven Tyler again, but it is just a glitch with the YouTubes.  If you get that message try again in a few seconds and you should get it.

I’m sorry for the delay in posting.  I have been rather busy this weekend with CPAC and everything, but as I promised you last week, I am taking up Michael Steele’s challenge.  Tomorrow I hope to release my new video that takes our core conservative values and places them in a hip hop urban-suburban setting.  I’m hoping to be dropping some fresh rhymes in the AM so check it out tomorrow. Peace out

I was overwhelmed to see at least a half-dozen black or brown faces at the Republican Convention this year

Today, the Republican National Committee has named former Maryland Lieutenant Governor Michael Steele as its head.  I know what you’re thinking and I am proud to announce that after several google searches I can confirm that Mister Steele is indeed African-American.   I expect that he may have been the African-American that I thought I saw several times at the Republican Convention last November.

Republicans like myself who were disheartened when Alan Keyes left the party last year, can take pride in knowing that we now have a black man in charge of our party.   What should truly be a source of pride for all Republicans is that 40% of all black RNC members ran for President of the organization.  With Steele at the helm, I wouldn’t be surprised to see a black Republican Senator or Governor by 2014 or 2016.

Of course, the greatest thing about the election of Steele was that his selection was a way to say to the rest of the world, “Hey, we’ve got a black guy too!”   Several other lower RNC positions were also filled tonight, but things had to be streamlined so that that Republicans could get out of the hall before a scheduled wedding.